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4 Types of Vomiting Kids

types of vomiting kids

From personal experience in the past few days there is 4 types of vomiting kids. I have one of each if you want to know how my past week is going. First hand experience in watching a house full of kids go down with the gastro bug inspired today’s post. It’s shitty 😉

The Shocked One. They have either never experienced vomit or have pushed it to the back of their memories so each time is a shock. Their eyes open wide and they sit in the same spot trying to figure out what is happening. They do nothing at all to try and prevent a mess from happening. After they are done they will most likely freak out. You will freak out. Everyone will be looking back trying to figure out how they missed the signs of impending doom. 

The Panicker. This is the kid that panics the moment the stomach contents start moving up instead of down. Even if they are in front of the toilet or holding a puke bucket they will forget about it and get up in an effort to ‘freak the fuck out’. They will yell for help as the yesterday’s dinner spews on every wall, floor, and piece of furniture. They will continue to move around so that they cause the most destruction and you better cross your fingers that they don’t stand at the top of the stairs and rain down stomach contents everywhere. Cleaning up vomit that goes higher than you is no fun. Also, there will be no vomit in the toilet or puke bucket. It will be the only place they missed.

The Projectile Vomiter. This is the one that will be okay one moment and be marking the wall 2 feet away the next. If they are sleeping the vomit will go up and then rain down its contents from corner to corner. You will be both shocked and amazed by the power and distance of this kids vomit. 

Bulls Eye. This is the kids that always gets every drop in either the toilet or puke bowl. No matter how violent the episode of sickness is they will continue to make it a hole in one. Clean up is a breeze and you dub this child your favourite puker. You decide to write a blog post about puking because this child gives you hope and you want to share it with other parents. You promise this kid their favourite snack and a unicorn for being so amazing. 

Did I miss any types of vomiting kids?

types of vomiting kids

 

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Aneta Alaei
Aneta Alaei

Aneta is a Toronto-based mom of four that loves a good meal, great company, and learning something new. In her free time, you can find her trying to keep yet another plant alive.

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10 Comments

  1. LisaM
    April 12, 2018 / 6:19 pm

    Thankfully I can count the times my 7-year-old has puked (aside from infancy) on one hand!

  2. Debbie White Beattie
    April 14, 2018 / 5:16 am

    OMG They all set off a chain reaction with me because I’m the sympathizer and every time I see the first wrech I’m done and running for the toilet

  3. Sara
    April 15, 2018 / 11:30 am

    Lol The joys of parenthood 🙂

  4. ivy pluchinsky
    May 8, 2018 / 12:43 pm

    haha oh the joys of parenthood! kids can be challenging

  5. Treen Goodwin
    May 9, 2018 / 9:48 am

    My oldest would always puke all over the rug , he wouldn’t even try to run to the bathroom , ughhh so gross and what a mess , oh the joys !!!!

  6. HEIDI C.
    May 9, 2018 / 11:28 pm

    My son is the quiet vomiter. He has throw up in his bed and then quietly tiptoed into my room to tell me or he has tried to clean it up himself.

  7. kristen visser
    May 16, 2018 / 8:12 am

    lmao! i got a kick out of this post. my daughter is definitely the Panicker ! she does run to the toilet most of the time but she panicks while doing so.

  8. kathy downey
    May 20, 2018 / 12:58 pm

    Oh the joys of Motherhood,glad it’s behind you !

  9. Erin N
    June 29, 2018 / 6:02 pm

    LOL! This made me laugh out loud for real 😛

  10. kathy downey
    December 9, 2019 / 10:02 am

    What an interesting read ! Never knew there were so many!